School is almost out. The days are hotter (and way too humid already if you ask me!) Along with those lazy days of summer comes lots of time at the pool, the beach, on bikes and pretty much any other outdoor activity imaginable. I know the boys love their time off, but it also means extra worry for me as their mom.

Jake kayaking last summer

At work (and with Jake and Sam) I have also been talking to the kids about being careful and doing all they can to avoid getting hurt. Some tips I have shared with them are:

• Always wear your helmet and safety gear when on your bike, scooter, skateboard, etc.
• Never swim alone or go near or into water without an adult nearby
• Learn to swim…..a very important skill to stay safe
• Wear sunscreen
• Watch driveways when you are riding your bike, scooter, skateboard, etc
• Listen to what adults tell you…we do know what we are talking about and we want you safe

The list could go on and on, but I know that the kids will only retain so much.

Our children count on us to keep them safe and sometimes they forget that they have a role to play as well. Just because mom and dad may not be outside it does not mean it is OK to get on that bike without a helmet. Just because your best friend jumps in the deep end of the pool that does not mean you should. Sometimes I feel like a broken record with the boys or like I am telling them the obvious, but I will happily listen to the whines of “we know, mom” if it keeps them safe.

Are you ready for summer? Do you have a safety talk with your kids?

I know that sitting down and pondering all the blessings in my life is the best way to REMEMBER why I love being a mom to my tween!!  So, here we go……..I’m sure lots of you mothers out there can relate to this!! 

This is my tribute to my tween, Lincoln!

-I love his snaggle-tooth grin with some teeth missing, some crooked and some half way grown in.

-I love the scowl he gives me when he really DOES NOT want to do the things I have asked him to do.

-I love how randomly he will give me a hug and say “I love you, mom”.

-I love his insightful questions about life, “Why do cows chew like that?”, “Why do you have so many freckles?” and “Why is my sister so mean to me”?

-I love his sweet and pure innocense and his genuine goodness.

-I love watching him engrossed in a book and quietly reading on the floor.

-I love that when he wakes up in the morning he always comes and give me a hug and has that cute bed head I always tease him about.

-I love when he comes and tells me when someone has hurt his feelings and I can talk it through with him and our relationship grows stronger.

-I love that he tells me so honestly when he HATES something I make for dinner and when he LOVES something I make for dinner.

-I love that in about a year he will be taller then me.

-I love when I watch him treat others kindly.

-I love when he gets really mad at me and stomps around and looks absolutely ridiculous!

-I love how he NEVER stops playing and loves being around friends and other kids.

-I love how he is so kind to others and how everyone enjoys being around him.

I should do a list like this every day to remind myself how lucky I am to be a mom to my tween boy!!

If you made a list like this about your tween, what would it say?

The mom part of me looks forward to Memorial Day weekend because I get my tween home for a long weekend.  The military side of me is grateful for a day to remember and honor those who have died serving our country, those who have served and those who currently risk their lives in serving.  The wife side of me is grateful for the “96″ or the extra day my husband may get to spend with us. 

Despite all the many reasons I love Memorial Day, the fact remains that there is a greater purpose than an extra day off from school or work.  There are many people who have lost husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, and uncles in war.  There are many who continue to die to protect our freedom.  They didn’t get a day off.  I feel a great responsibility to teach my children why they get certain days off from school. 

I like to share with my kids their military legacy, especially those whom have served in our own family.  I think it’s important for them to realize that it was a sacrifice.  Many were injured, some recovered and some have long lasting affects from what they were exposed to.  I want them to be proud that their dad served in our current war.  I want them to learn empathy for those around them as some of their friends often have deployed parents or have lost family members.  I want my children to appreciate the freedoms that we as Americans enjoy. 

Even though I’m looking forward to us all being together for a long weekend, I want to remember why we get to be together.  There are many who won’t be complete as a family during this holiday and to them, we owe tribute. 

How do you teach your children about Memorial Day and Veterans Day?  Is it just a day off?

Believe it or not, sugar can cause the grumpies to take hold!

I tell you what, my tween comes down with the major grumpies sometimes.  It is a life long quest I’m sure I will be fighting.  How do I handle it? Do I get angry, do I try to talk about it or do I just leave him alone?  The truth is, I think it changes all the time.

I have found a few factors that contribute to the grumpies, such as:

- Not enough sleep

- Hungry

- Needing alone time (away from siblings and friends)

- Needing time with mom or dad….alone!

- Or, too much sugar (usually after a birthday party or picnic with lots of sugar involved)

The funny thing, I can totally relate to his feelings.  I can get the grumpies in situations like these too.  Whenever my tween is dealing with the grumpies, I try to run through the same check list, then I try and solve the problem.  Here are some great solutions for the grumpies….

- Quiet time in their room (usually when I go to check in on him….he is crashed and the much needed nap is taken care of!)

- A peanut butter sandwich and a big glass of milk

- A fun toy and snack in his bedroom with the door closed and no SISTERS aloud.

- A date with Dad when he comes home from work (send them off to run errands together and get an ice cream cone on the way home).

- A BIG glass of water and snuggles on the couch with a good book to let the sugar rush wear off.

There is usually always a reason behind our tweens behavior.  I have to remind myself to take a step back, assess the situation and figure out what is really going on with my tween.

How do you deal with your tween when he/she gets a case of the grumpies?

We have always wanted the boys to be able to try new sports and make their own decision about whether they liked it or not. All the usual suspects….soccer, T-ball, Tae Kwan Do, swimming…….each season when sign ups roll around we try something new or ask if they want to continue with a favorite. They seem to have settled on tennis, swimming and lacrosse. I just wonder how that will be affected now that things are becoming more competitive.

T ball.....when all that mattered was showing up

T-ball at three was pretty laid back for Jake and soccer at four was not exactly a thrilling grudge match between two tested opponents for Sam. Now that we are moving into tween territory, winning is more of a focus and the boys are running into more driven and experienced kids. My oldest, Jake, seems to be getting more comfortable with this. I think I heard him yell “get them” with his lacrosse stick above his head at one point this spring. I know Sam is not far behind.

I want them to strive to win, but I also don’t want them to lost sight of the bigger picture: to work hard, give their best and congratulate their opponent for a good game – no matter the outcome. They need to learn to be part of a team and to not let teammates down. They need to learn a work ethic and to challenge themselves. I also want them to have a blast, make new friends and stay healthy. If we can balance all of that, I think I am OK with a little more competition.

Do your tweens Play sports? Any great stories to share?