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Socializing with other young people has finally taught the girls a few words that I’m not crazy about.  I won’t go into profanities, but just words like hate and phrases like: I’m not your friend anymore, that sucks, and shut up are just a few on the list.  I am pretty good at monitoring my own speech in front of the girls; I don’t want them to get it from me.  However,  I also know that this is just an inevitable stage in the whole scheme of growing up. 

I’ve tried two basic techniques to  stop the swearing.  The first was punishment.  This is very effective with one of my daughters, but not so much with the other.  Last time Vannah let one slip, I made sure to take the Wii and television away.  I haven’t had a problem with potty mouth ever since.  While this is effective with one child, it doesn’t work that well with Mallory.  With Mallory, if I completely ignore her (no attention whatsoever) she stops and realizes why she’s not turning my head. 

In addition, I’ve been monitoring what they see on TV a little more closely (could they have figured out the cable box behind my back?) I also talk to them about using appropriate words to describe your feelings, no matter how angry or sad you happen to be at that very moment.  Finally, I made sure to let them know that those types of words are harsh and can hurt the feelings of those around; there are much more gentle choices available to articulate their thoughts. 

How do you deal with potty mouth?  In what ways do you try and prevent it?  How do you stop this negative social influence?

If your kids are like mine at all, they are easily mesmerized by the glow of the Xbox or Nintendo DS (or any other particular console you may have.) Whether its sports, fantasy or strategy games, at some point in my week I need to fend off two obsessed little men who will do almost anything for “just a few” more minutes of game time.

We have never allowed them to play excessively. We have a timer that is set and they cannot go over 60 minutes per day. Sounds easy enough…..right? Not so fast!

The boys have to earn their time on the clock. They do things like go to bed on time (no whining), get ready in the morning (without being told 10 times to do s0) and they help with little chores. All of this earns them “daddy dollars” that they can spend on game minutes. One dollar earns them 10 minutes. This works well on the front end of game time….to get them started. It is when itis time to turn off the console that the real problem begins.

I hear “I need to finish this battle” or “Can I ride it just one more time?” It never fails. Not once has the timer beeped and immediately been followed with the controller down and game off. What has also never failed is that I do not allow the extra time so someone please tell me why they keep trying anyway??

I suppose it will always be like this….time is earned, timer beeps, groveling begins and I reply again “no, turn it off.”

Anyone else have little gamers to contend with? What is your strategy to limit time?

On a side note…anyone looking to create your own daddy dollars for an incentive here is the link.

Mini is 9 years old. That means that she’s hanging around other 9ish year olds. And other 9 year olds don’t necessarily have parents that take such an interest in what they watch on the television or hear on the radio as AM and I do, which means they may have more exposure to foul language and then expose Mini to it.

Mini has heard curse words before. She’s even heard them from me. But I try very hard to use more…humorous than offensive words (son of a biscuit, for example.)

When she was younger, maybe 3 or 4, a very funny thing happened. I was driving from Swansboro to Wilmington and had gotten about five miles from home when I realized I left my wallet at home. I uttered a word that I didn’t think Mini heard and coincidentally rhymed with the large truck that was passing by Mini’s window. I turned the car around, got my wallet and carried on with the trip without further incident. Months later, with Mini’s mother and my in-laws in the car with Mini and me, a large truck rolled by Mini’s window. So she thought she’d let everyone in the car know…”Look, that’s a big [insert word that rhymes with, but isn’t, truck]!” Not my best example of parenting, but we’re supposed to learn from each other, right?

The only saving grace from that event is that Mini had no idea what she was saying. She had heard me mumble the word as a large truck rumbled past and connected those dots. She repeated it, thinking it was another word for truck. Interestingly, she’s never made the connection since, even though there weren’t histrionics over it.

The point is this: Kids are going to be exposed to foul language, from their friends or their parents or the television. All we can do is educate them that those words, even if we sometimes use them, are often not the best to use. They can make us appear uneducated and unintelligent at best and rude at worst.

Have you had language problems with your tweens? How did you tackle them? Leave your ideas, questions and suggestions in the comments.

Alright, so Jon’s still deployed … and … fingers crossed … everything has been pretty smooth.  The girls had a touch of the stomach bug on Thursday/Friday, but hey, we made it through four days of school, which at this point, seems to be a miracle.  Jon called last week, late in the week, which made me feel a whole lot better.  He said that everyone was okay which in itself was a relief. 

Meantime, here at home, I just can’t get ahead.  I got behind from the kids being nonstop sick for the past month and a half and can’t seem to make any progress.  It’s getting frustrating!!!!  I live off of Red Bull some days. 

However, hiring the cleaning lady has been immeasurably helpful and taken some of the weight off my shoulders, however I still can’t remember to pay the sewer bill (had it in my purse for three days now), and can’t seem to put an end to our laundry crisis.  This month the dogs need to be taken to the vet as does the cat.  I’m hoping that nobody gets sick, myself included.  The toilet is broken (you know the plastic piece that attaches to the handle) and has been for roughly a week and a half.  After I’m done writing, I’m on my way to Lowe’s so that I can get the part to fix it.   

Other than that, I’m just praying that everyone over there is okay.  Quite honestly, in Jon’s previous deployments, the media wasn’t as precise and “in your face.”  People are sending me tons of articles and pictures about what they’re doing over there and quite honestly, I’d just as soon pretend that he was on a vacation to the Bahamas for a few months.  I’m growing increasingly tired of the politics behind it all; don’t even get me started.

If you’re a military spouse, stop by our Military Mattersgroup on MomTalk to share and connect with other parents facing simliar issues.

It seems spring may finally be here (I know…I may have spoken too soon,) but I am a positive thinker!

If we really can count on warmer (and very soon longer, too) days, we should also count on doing all we can to get our kids outside and moving! With two boys and working in a school, I see what too much time cooped up inside can do to a child and it is not pretty. All that energy inside needs to go somewhere and I don’t know about you, but I would rather it be directed at a soccer ball or bike than my living room lamp or our Xbox.

Don’t get me wrong…..I think video games have a time and place (like very long car rides) and my kids do know how to play inside without breaking things, but I don’t want them to fall in love with being inside the four walls of our home. I want them to enjoy playing outside. I want them to meet kids down the street and play cops and bad guys. I want them to yell, get dirty and really, really tired (all this makes for easy bed times, too!)

I see too many kids today with their heads buried in the Nintendo DS or tired after running one lap around the playground. It is up to parents to push those kids outside. Don’t give them the option to stay in. Get out there with them, go on a bike ride or take a walk with the dog. It is up to parents to set the example and with spring and summer on their way, it is time to show our children how much fun it can be to get out and live a little in this world, and not just the one created by their games and TV.

Any ideas for ways to get kids to want to go outside and play? What are some of your favorite outdoor activities?