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Part of discipline includes making some not very popular rules, such as what to wear in public.

Movies, video games and even iconic toys like the girls from Bratz (shown in the video above) sport bare legs and navels peeking out. But is that the right look for a 9-year-old girl?

Most parents say no, but many kids find it hard to agree. With so many mall shops offering sexy styles for the youngest girls, some parents wonder whether their daughters are risking sexual harassment for the sake of fashion.

Sexuality is a serious issue, says Heather Johnston Nicholson, Ph.D., director of research at Girls Incorporated, a national nonprofit youth organization. “Primarily, girls aren’t dressing that way to attract men, but to please each other. It’s not fair to make girls responsible for the actions of boys and men — but safety is a vital issue.”

How can you approach this? Tell your girls, “‘You’re sending messages you may not be aware of. Let’s talk about when and where it’s safe to be trendy and uncovered, and where it’s unsafe or inappropriate,’” Dr. Nicholson says.

Much of the trend toward sexy clothing for the youngest girls starts with the media. From music videos to fashion magazines to fashion sites on the Web, girls are barraged with images of ultra-thin models in ultra-skimpy outfits. One key to fighting media messages, says Dr. Nicholson, is helping your daughter question the messages she’s getting.

“By the time they’re 10,” says Dr. Nicholson, “girls are ready to be treated with respect, and to be included in the process. They’re ready to take on leadership, make change and do things.”

To read the full article on OHealthy, click here. How do you handle these discussions?

This month at TweenBeat, we’re focusing on self-esteem and body image. It’s a rough road that we, as parents, have to travel and it’s fraught with obstacles and land-mines, especially when our children are old enough to choose their own outfits and dress themselves. We want our children to express their identities and to be comfortable with their bodies, but we need them to be presentable when going out and about in the civilized world.

Mini loves to watch the Disney show Hannah Montana. As most of you know, Ms. Montana has quite a…”unique sense of dress.” She often has wildly different colors and patterns and tends to accessorize with bandanas, bangle-bracelets and wigs. Mini has frequently wanted to wear striped pants with a polka-dotted shirt and a combination of real and fake jewelry that would make the Queen cry.

I try not to be too authoritarian on the matter of clothing, unless she sees something completely out of line at a store and asks to get it or wears a combination of colors and textures that just don’t belong. Sometimes it’s hard to admit when the clothes really don’t matter as long as everything is covered and it’s weather-appropriate (at the park, for example) and sometimes it’s hard to draw the line when it comes to appropriate clothing, but we need to teach our children how to dress now if they’re going to be able to wear situation-appropriate clothing in the future.

A big issue Mini and I run into is that she often packs her clothing for the weekends she spends with AM and me. If she doesn’t bring any nice clothes, we can’t eat at a really nice restaurant (this isn’t often an issue as Mini would rather eat at Golden Corral, Chuck E. Cheese or Mai Tai) or go to really nice places. Just this weekend, we visited my parents in western NC. The weather forecast called for temperatures dipping into the 40s (it actually hit the 30s!) and Mini had packed two short sleeved shirts, one made of a very thin nylonish material and a couple of thin pants. Fortunately, we really didn’t plan to do much outside, but, if we did, she’d be pretty uncomfortable! She learned her lesson, I think, and will think about the weather when packing up for trips.

I try to appeal to Mini’s sense of logic, but I have to admit, she hasn’t developed a strong one, yet. It’s hard for me to pull the “Because I said so” card, but sometimes, it’s all that’s between a reasonably-dressed little girl and something that looks like it came from another world.

What clothing and style issues have you had with your children? What tools do you use to get them to dress appropriately? Share your ideas or questions in the comments.