I must be in a sports mood with this nice weather outside so I’ll talk more this week about the boys and their on field adventures. We are about two weeks into lacrosse season and I am seeing some big changes in Jake. I even see a difference between this and basketball that is just ending for him. Up to this point, sports was still not very serious. He was in the little kid divisions and in some cases, did not even play games. Something has changed this time around.

Lacrosse Clinic Last Fall

I should have known from that first night he put on his lacrosse gear. If I could have taped him strutting back to the car in his helmet and pads you would know what I mean. He just acted different. There was a swagger to his walk like “look at me, I am a lacrosse player.” Last year it was more like ” Wow…I get to hold a stick!” He may only be 8, but he practices with kids ages 8-10 and I think he his stepping up his game. I can see an athlete now where they used to just be a kid running around on the field.

It really hit me after his practice this week. He came back to the car to head home and when I helped him pull his helmet off he was a sweaty mess! I had never seen him like that before after any practice. His response also told me things were no longer the same…..”what mom, I was running…the other kids are like that too.” Funny how moms notice little things like this and they become big moments. I will forever remember that time, by the back of the car, as one of the moments when I realized he is not a little boy anymore.

When did you have a moment like that?

We are about to wrap up basketball season and move into lacrosse and tennis. I am glad that Jake and Sam have tried just about every sport they could. I want them to at least experience each one and then decide what they like and what they can live without. To this point we have given a thumbs down to soccer (no fault of the coach , but everything else seems to be fairly fun for them. Luckily, they have had good coaches along the way who have been supportive and great teachers. I think that has made all the difference in the world.

Great coaches care and understand they are working with kids..not adults.

I applaud those who coach, just as I applaud anyone who teaches. For the most part they have had volunteer coaches on base or out in town. The coaches give up their time to help my child learn some new skills and have fun while they do it. Each time the boys have tried something new, they have jumped in knowing nothing. They have often played with kids who have played before and that could go one of two ways. They could feel so far behind and overwhelmed that they never want to try again or they can feel secure, safe and supported and given time to develop on their own time table. Thankfully the latter has been the case each time and they have had a blast trying new sports.

With tennis ramping up, the boys will get some time with their favorite coach and Jake is thriving on the lacrosse field. It is so fun to watch them have fun and get better each week. I wish every child had experiences like this on the court or field…..sports should be fun at this age. After all, if they don’t have fun now and learn the fundamentals, how will they ever make it to the Horseshoe at Ohio State on Saturdays??

GO BUCKEYES!

Have you had great coaches? Any bad ones in the bunch?

Which way will we go??

From some previous posts (like this one) you may know that we are in limbo at the moment. My husband’s career could go a couple of different ways and this means we are not sure what our plans are for this summer. We could move to another state, stay put one more year or move overseas (new option I learned of this past week! ). With so much up in the air I sometimes wonder how much the boys really need to know at this point. Do they need to be in the loop or should we just fill them in when we have a firm decision?

It was so much easier when they were little. We moved and they could have cared less! By the time Jake was 4 he had already lived in three states and four houses. It made no difference to them where were were or how often we moved. As long as they had mom with them (and dad when he was stateside), things were OK and stable in their eyes. Now it is different. They are school age and no matter where we go, they will make a big transition to a new school next fall. I know how stressed out I am about all of this and I just feel like maybe keeping them in the dark another month or two won’t hurt.

The truth is, they don’t have a say in what happens so I suppose they might as well just be told the final course of action. I am not even sure they could wrap their heads around all of our options and choices at this point. My biggest concern is that I keep my cool and don’t become too stressed around them at this point. They know daddy has an interview this week and that is about it. I think I’ll keep it that way for now.

Did you ever keep things like this from your kids to lessen their stress?

Jake is 8 and Sam is 6. When Jake was 5 he hated to clean up his toys. Sam will still sit and complain about his meal for 2 hours if he is in one of his “moods.”  No matter what age they are or how many stages they go through…it is always something. I really thought there would be some magical age where all of these little issues would go away…..it looks like I was wrong.

I am not sure what I expected. There was no age I had in mind..no time table. I just told myself  that at some point, they would be more mature and the antics would end. Clearly, I was delusional Of course, the problems and behaviors change as they get older. Jake cleans up now without complaining, but he has moved on to arguing with me for more XBox time. Sam’s food issues still come up,but not as often. Now he seems to like arguing more with Jake.

Round and round we seem to go…we lose one quirk and pick up another. I am slowly coming to the realization that no matter what age the boys are….I will have to continue to be their teacher and mom and help them work through these things. After all, would I really be a mom if I did not have to get on them to get their clothes IN the hamper (not next to it) or remind them for the 15th time that lights need to be turned off when they leave a room?

What about your Tweens? Do you find yourself dealing with one thing after another?

I have posted earlier about my husband and his quest to join the FBI. I have talked about how it has been 10 months since phase I and just now he is on to phase II. It is all a very complicated and time consuming mess to me, but I know he wants it badly so we are working through it. The problem is, with all of this waiting, comes uncertainty and we don’t know where we will be living next fall.

Mind you, if we were young and/or childless it would not be a big deal. We could go with the flow and pick up and move anytime. Of course, that is not our situation. Jake and Sam are transitioning to public school next year. Wherever they start school is where we want them to stay for the year. What worries us is that the way things have gone so far with this process, we may have to be apart for all or part of the year to make this happen. The worst part is we have no way of knowing when we’ll be able to make any kind of decision. Can someone say STRESS?

All of this limbo has also meant I needed to tell my boss that she can’t count on me to return to St Annes as a teacher next year. I can’t tell her yes and they leave her hanging in August if something should happen and we had to move suddenly. Thankfully Jake and Sam are too young to care too much about the details of all of this, but I know they are counting on us to make sure they have stability next school year. That is out #1 goal…..I just hope we can make it happen.

Is anyone else in limbo right now? It is PCS season soon…..are you worried about a possible move and how it will affect your kids?