Fall weather has us exccited to exercise in a more comfortable temperature, wanting to play outside and take advantage of the fresh air, and enjoying mother nature’s gifts.  Leaves are turning colors, pumpkin picking is over and we sense winter coming.  This is a time of year that can become very busy and hectic, but it’s important to remember to slow down the pace and let our tweens have stress free fun outside!

Our kids are inside the majority of the day at school and have limited daylight when they come home.  We are trying to switch the schedule a little to play before homework so that they can take advantage of daylight.  We are enjoying our less scheduled time together and are playing outside, ALOT!

Here are some suggestions to get your tween outside and having fun:

Take a walk as a family

Play a hardy game of tag

Do yardwork together

Build something together…birdhouses or feeders are perfect this time of year.

Have a spontaneous outdoor marshmallow war as a family.

Have a cookout or Roast Marshmallows together and enjoy being outdoors telling stories.

There are many fall fun activities to do as a family to get you outside being active and building healthy relationships.

Why is fresh air important?  Fresh air produces a healthy mind, clean lungs, and a calmer constitution when we actively use it. Getting outdoors should not be a chore, but a privilege. Enjoy the earth and get your dose of fresh air.

The National Wildlife Federation urges parents to institute an outdoor “green hour” for kids. Start by suggesting just one more activity each weekend–a family bike ride or an after-dinner walk. Next, add a weekday event. Some other ideas (find more at greenhour.org)  By making outdoor play mandatory and being out with your kids, you are also taking advantage of the benefits of fresh air and living the example!

What are your family’s favorite fall activities?

President Eisenhower signing HR7786, changing Armistice Day to Veterans Day. From left: Alvin J. King, Wayne Richards, Arthur J. Connell, John T. Nation, Edward Rees, Richard L. Trombla, Howard W. Watts

This week our kids will have a day off of school to honor Veterans.  It’s not just a day off.  It is meant to be celebrating the lives of those lost, as well as those serving and those living whom have served in war times.  It marks sacrifice, service, patriotism, honor and oftentimes loss.  Many Veterans live today with wounds, disease, injuries, and debilitating illnesses that were caused from their time served in other countries.  I was excited to hear my tween come home and say that they had been writing thank you notes to Veterans to be given out at VA hospitals.

What do you know about Veteran’s Day?  I’ll admit that I’m rusty on my history and that made me research so that I’ll have answers for my children.  A good source is, http://www1.va.gov/opa/vetsday/vetdayhistory.asp

So, what will you be doing in Veteran’s Day celebration?

Locally, many parades were held this past Saturday.  However, you can pay tribute to those lost by attending memorial services at a military cemetery, having your children visit or serve those at wounded warrior houses, visit the Beirut Memorial Wall, write letters of gratitude to those whom have served in war or who are currently serving, serve those families of soldiers whom have deployed, or call family members and express gratitude for their service in past war deployments.

This is our family’s second year having our Veteran home.  It has brought on new meaning to know firsthand of his sacrifice and of those whom he had served with.  We have learned empathy and increased gratitude by living through a deployment and knowing the sacrifice and toll is takes on the family and soldier/sailor.  We are grateful to live in a country where we have the freedom to choose, to vote, to believe and to raise our children how we view.

What will you be doing on your day off to teach your children about why we receive that day off?

Lately, I have been very grateful as a mother for the many blessings I see around me.  I’m grateful for a hard working husband, for a job that supports our family, for our religion, my good friends, for the beauty that surrounds us.  There are so many things to be thankful for.  I want my children to know gratitude and a good attitude.  I notice that my tween’s tone and attitude often reflect my own.  Examples are extremely important.  We are entering the season of Thanksgiving and quickly it is followed by the season of giving and receiving.  Where will my childrenss values lie?

How do you foster an attitude of gratitude?  How can we teach our children about how blessed they are compared to so many children elsewhere that have little to nothing?  I am grateful for the opportunity I have as a mother and all the chances I get to teach my children.  I hope and pray I can keep a level head and teach them the right.

Here are some tips that have helped me remember to have an attitude of gratitude:

1. Keep a gratitude journal.  Write down the things you are grateful for and acknowledge all your blessings.

2.  Express gratitude frequently and out loud

3.  Write thank you notes to acknowledge help, gifts, and appreciation

4.  Make this a habit- as a family, practice gratitude within your home and communities, even remembering the people behind scenes…the janitors at school, the bus driver, the teachers aids, etc.

5. Teach gratitude during the hard times too… with a positive attitude you can still see the good during the bad.

Teaching gratitude to our tweens takes time.  It takes teaching them about looking outside of themselves.  It takes practice and patience since it is easy to get resistance for writing thank yous, etc.  Tis the season of teaching attitudes of gratitude and with the economy things might be a little more simplistic this year and preparing your tweens and kids will reflect a much better attitudes and prepare them to appreciate all they do have.

How do you teach appreciation?

With the recent weather and rain, Onslow County Schools had announced for two days in a row that children would not be able to attend school.  So, that means those days obviously have to be accounted for and made-up.  What children don’t understand is how a holiday can become a make-up day, especially when military parents are off and they are now off to school.  Also, a day before a holiday, once designated as a safe traveling day, is now another make-up day.

These make-up days don’t account for family in town, holiday travel plans, etc.  It was mother nature that brought the rain and hence the days off.  It is reality of school funding, obligatory days and attendance within the schools and it’s life.  However, as a parent I was very disappointed about the lack of communication of letting us know these days.  I did NOT receive a phone call, a letter home, etc.  Rather, I looked on the school board website to find a revised school day listing (click this link, Revised SY Calendar 2010-2011 to download the PDF they posted).

How were you notified?  How did your children handle the news of having to go to school on a holiday?  How do you teach your tween to deal with life changes and disappointments?  Much of this comes down to attitude and reality of life.  The only thing constant is change and as hard as it is, it is a fact of life.

It has made me think about ways I can do better as a parent to prepare my child for events like this.  We certainly had fun on our rain days off.  However, it was a sad day to watch my tween and son have to go to school and leave their Dad behind as well as visiting family.  Some could say that I could have kept them home, however, being military and not knowing our life’s future or deployments, we guard those 16 days that are allowed without punishment for illness, necessary travel, etc.

How did you all deal with the recent storms, days off and make-up days?

We have all survived the first week and a half of a new school year.  New classrooms, new dynamics, new teachers and new classmates.  As with most tweens, my daughter is not exempt from wanting to make new friends.  Since we are military and have lived here for almost 5 years, we have seen the constant move-ins and move-outs of our children’s friends.

My tween especially needs a close friend.  Unfortunately, she has not been able to make that “best friend” for a long time.  This year she knew a few girls in her fourth grade class and one was from her dance school.  She’s not only excited about having her in her class, she wants to do everything that she does, including taking 8 dance classes and dancing every day of the week!  She also wants to “dress to impress,” regardless of mom’s two cents about weather, matching or over accessorizing.  That’s quite the change from what my tween expressed last week before dance open house.  So, is this peer pressure or wanting and needing a new friend?

I am one to believe that a little healthy peer pressure can be good and so can making new friends.  I also think that taking dance will be good for my daughter as long as she can learn to be disciplined about homework and continue to do well without stressing herself out.  I am a little worried she may be over-scheduling herself, but thankfully, her dance director is very open and honest with me and willing to try this for a few months and then evaluate and readjust her dance schedule if necessary.

Being involved in extra curriculars helps boost self-esteem, helps build new friendships, teaches self-discipline, and has many positive affects for our tweens.  Although peer pressure normally has a negative connotation, it can sometimes be positive when those people or friends encourage you to stretch yourself and develop talents that you possess.   Despite last week’s article I wrote about to Dance or Not to Dance, my daughter has changed her mind again (surprise, surprise:)) and is now dancing 3 times a week in 4 different classes.  We did negotiate because of her siblings’ schedule and because I helped her realize that Mom isn’t superwoman.

I found this article especially helpful for my tween daughter… http://www.preteenagerstoday.com/resources/articles/girlyguide.htm

Have you found your tween faced with peer pressure?  Do your tween’s new friends encourage your tween to try new activities?  Do you believe peer pressure to be a negative or a positive?